Seems like I missed all the lessons about internal self-awareness for most part of my education and life…Oh! that’s right, they never taught any of us about it!
Internal self-awareness means knowing your own strengths and weaknesses, how to control your emotions, discovering what you truly value in life – and realizing how it all relates to your own decisions and actions.
This awareness is the first step because if you are not aware, there’s nothing you can change. For example, if you are not aware that your mind is full of wounds and emotional poison, you cannot begin to clean and heal the wounds and you will continue to suffer.
There is no reason to suffer. With awareness you can rebel and say, “This is enough!” and live a more fulfilling life.
“You can look for a way to heal and transform your personal dream” – Don Miguel Ruiz.
Research shows that approximately 95% of people believe they’re self-aware, but only about 15–20% really are. So many of us believe that we’re more self-aware than we really are…the truth is, there’s so much we don’t know we don’t know.
We are far too often, wholly unaware of the emotional state we are currently in, and how that state is influenced by our thought process and therefore influence our will-power/behaviors.
I believe the practice of self-awareness is one of the greatest skills in life because it enables you to learn about yourself in a way no one else can really fully teach you.
Creating this ability to see ourselves clearly, understand our emotional triggers and biases, it is the foundation for Emotional Fitness enabling you to design what works for you, so you can then design the lifestyle you desire.
We become more confident and more creative. We make sounder decisions, build stronger relationships, and communicate more effectively. We’re less likely to lie, cheat, and steal. We are better workers who get more promotions. And we’re more-effective leaders with more-satisfied employees and more-profitable companies.
For years my life seemed good, despite of the challenges, I used faith & positivity to “look at the bright side of all”, but there was also a great sort of emptiness feeling that became something I could no longer ignore. I realized I had been able to ignore and even repress this feeling because I didn’t have the self-awareness to explore it. Has this ever happened to you?
The fact is that the majority of our thoughts and actions are on autopilot.
This isn’t necessarily a bad thing either. We have an average of 70,000 thoughts per day, therefore our habits, routines, impulses, and reactions carry us through our lives so we don’t have to stop and think about it every single time.
The problem is when we’re on autopilot for so long that we forget we’re on autopilot and when we’re not even aware of our own habits, routines, impulses, and reactions, then we no longer control them—they control us.
We tend to avoid this feeling of discomfort through distraction. Driving ourselves into numbness, transporting our minds to some other time or place or world where it can feel safe and insulated…obsessing about the past or our potential futures, making plans we’ll never keep, or simply try to forget.
Using our phone, social media, TV, games, even food to carry us to another world where no pain exists, this easily provides temporary the feeling of certainty that we all seek, but the reality is that binging on distractions will only bring more pain down the line.
Yes we all need some sort of diversion to keep us sane and happy. but our distractions need to be beneficial, planned and moderated.
Benefits of Self-Awareness
Aids self-control, creativity, pride, and self-esteem
Predicts self-development, acceptance, and proactivity
Facilitates decision-making
Leads to more accurate self-reports
Required to develop self-control
So what can you do now to start improving your self-awareness? here’s some of what mental health experts recommend:
1. Get to know yourself more by writing it down:
“Clinically, the most effective method for the development of self-awareness is a pause and brief check-in with oneself.” Grab a notebook or journal and write down what you value, thoughts or any positive and negative feelings associated with the day.
-How am I feeling right now? – What do I think might be driving that feeling I didn’t like/I loved? – What triggers may have caused them to rise up? and so on.
2. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness refers to being present in the moment and paying attention to yourself and your surroundings rather than getting lost in distractions. This could be done by mediating, spending time in nature, a silent walk, a run.
3. Seek honest feedback from loving critics: Ask family or close friends about what they think about you. Have them describe you and see what rings true with you and what surprises you. Of course, don’t take any one person’s word as the entire truth; you need to talk to a variety of people to get a comprehensive view of yourself.
4. Hiring a Life Coach: could also support you in this journey, helping you discover your perceived restrictions.
It’s also important to know that some people who have an extremely high sense of self-awareness, excessive self-consciousness can result. If you feel that you are struggling with a self-consciousness that is having a negative influence on your life, discuss your symptoms with your therapist or Life Coach to learn more about what you can do to cope with these feelings.
“When we see ourselves clearly, we are empowered to make changes and to build on our areas of strength as well as identify areas where we would like to make improvements”
